This year has been all about the ride. I have been running through life.
I have been at the best, I have been at the worst, there have been times where I just wanted to give up and say fuck it all, fuck you all, I can’t hack any of this.
I won’t lie, I have learned a lot about persistence this year. And about humanity. Because as much as you want to let somebody in sometimes you also have to see them out. No amount of tough love can heal the wounds some people inflict in you. And that’s hard. To let go of someone you love because they don’t love you right. Talk about breaking down.
As I said, I have danced a lot this year. In empty ballrooms, in dusty theatres, in places I’d rather never have to dance again. Not easy but I have finally found my equilibrium. And I have had sore feet, swollen ankles, a messy head, a heavy heart and some overfull lungs. Sometimes they were so full it really hurt to breathe. But I always made it. I always lived another day. Through gritted teeth, giving it my all, my everything. And I stumbled,waltzed,smiled,cried,laughed. Look at me because I did it all.
So here’s what I’ve learned: you will try and you will fail and you will try again and most likely fail again because this is how life works and most of the time things are just not fair (…) But if you keep trying you will get a day where things will actually start happening. If you wait long enough and you give it your all and you sit tight and you push harder you may actually get to the place you wanted. And if in the end you can’t and you don’t and you give up and decide you can’t take it you will still have all the things you have learned. Because no trying is futile. Because most moments in life are nothing but huge lessons.
So here’s to learning and here’s to keeping at it. Because you may knock me down but I will always come back up.
Come on 2016, I’m waitin’ for ya (…..)