I have a newfound hope: I hope for life.
The past few months have been a roller coaster. I have been tempted to quit countless times. I have snapped, I have yelled, I have furiously ran my pain and fears away. I have wiped one too many tears. I have fought one too many fears. In the end, I have been through it all.
And now spring is here. Life is brighter. Everything seems to be falling into place and I am sort of proud. I guess that if I stand on the sideline and look at the bigger picture I have succeeded. I have moved on at work, I have sort of fixed my knees, I have found a lifestyle I actually enjoy living. I can run and have fun while I am doing it. Tender mercies and all, I feel pretty lucky to be alive if I say so.
I’ve also learned a few things. Maybe what I have is not exactly what I want but I am learning how to appreciate it. I am flawed and that is ok. I can’t give everyone a 100, not even if I try and that’s ok too. I can settle for many good things instead of just one while the rest of my life falls apart. And I may still want to do crazy things sometimes and that’s fine too.
I guess that what I am trying to say is that if you feel lost in life your big chance is to just go with it and try. Cry if you fail, complain if you must, but never stop trying. Sit down, take a deep breath, break a few things, say something you don’t really mean but don’t quit. Whatever it is you are doing. Don’t quit. Don’t.fucking.quit.
Rewards may be closer than you’d ever think. Happy friday everyone! 🙂